Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
