I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
