I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Randomize