but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Life is so much better after having sex.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
