I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
