Sry I called you an 8
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
