Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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