I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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