Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Randomize
