True but thats because hes a fetus.
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
