No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
