forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
