careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
