More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
