The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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