And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
there is glitter all over my balls
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