Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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