I want to have your abortion
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
