Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
