Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
