i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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