get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i barfeds in our rink
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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