I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
