i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I understand Curling. That high.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
