Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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