I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
