Can i not drive my cunt home
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
