Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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