Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize