It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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