wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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