her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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