I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
