Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Randomize
