So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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