Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
Randomize
