i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
