you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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