Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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