If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Randomize