is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
