I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Screwed.edu
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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