so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
