I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
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