Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Randomize
