your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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