is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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