I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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