they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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