and you said cock pushups were impossible
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
