I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Randomize